Reading this article; How To Identify Fake Friends, doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re contemplating if a friend is not who they appear to be. It could be just to educate yourself or prepare for the unexpected.
After writing my article on How To Get Over A Heartbreak which received close to five thousand views, I decided to write something new. So, like I did in my previous article , I asked a dear friend for a new idea and she suggested a topic on How To Get Rid Of Fake Friends. But then I thought, to get rid of them, you have to know who they are.
A fake friend is someone who is pretending to be your friend an going to the extent of convincing you orally or with their actions that the friendship is real. But as you know, the truth always find a way of revealing itself.
I have been able to pick out some of the important things to consider in order to identify fake friends.
ALWAYS WANTING SOMETHING FROM YOU
Fake friends only hang around you when you are offering them something like;
- Social Life
- Life opportunities
- Relief from boredom or loneliness
- Or anything they’d benefit from
This is a friendship that is based on certain principles that may sometimes be absent which could automatically terminate the friendship.
To simplify, it is a friendship that is based on conditions like;
- You must be wealthy
- You must act in a certain way
- You must dress in a certain way
These are conditions that are subject to change at any point in life and since the friendship is based on those conditions, the moment it changes the friendship is gone.
A true friendship remains the same no matter what and it is not based on any conditions.
HOW THEY TREAT YOU IN PUBLIC AND PRIVATE
Have you noticed different kind of treatments when you are alone and when you are in public?
I mean; Are they nice to you when you’re alone and then treat you coldly in the presence of others?
If that is the case, then the friendship is not real. A real friend will treat you all the same no matter who is present. In fact, a real friend may even treat you more nicely in public just to show how important you’re in their life.
WHAT DO THEY SAY ABOUT YOU WHEN YOU ARE NOT AROUND?
What they say about you to other people when you’re not around is an indication of how they truly feel about you. If they say nice things about you, then you’re safe but if the reverse is the case, then I suggest you consider the relationship or read my next article.
A true friend will always try to defend you when others are saying negative things about you while fake will only add fuel to the fire.
HOW THEY LEAN TOWARDS YOUR PERSONAL ACHIEVEMENTS
Knowing the stance of your friends towards your personal achievements is an important factor to determine if they are real or not. It doesn’t necessarily mean that they have to help achieve your goals because some of them may not be in the position to do so. But it’s important to know more if they;
- Support your dreams
- Give good advice
- Are happy about your achievements
- Are ready to help you achieve your goals if they are in the position to do so
DO THEY VALUE YOU OPINION OR CHOICES?
A true friend will always listen to what you have to say even you’re not making sense and will later call your attention and point you towards the right direction. After pointing you towards what they believe is right, you may choose to follow your initial idea not to what the friend suggested. This is where you truly know how real the friendship is.
If at this point they start giving you attitude for not honouring their opinion, then the relationship you have can no longer be called friendship but rather a dictatorship.
The same principle applies to the way they value your choices. And should things go wrong, a true friend will still be their to comfort you and get you going again.
CAN YOU BE YOURSELF AROUND THEM?
You don’t need to be something else before you are comfortable around your true friend. A true friend will always accept you for who you are no matter how good or bad you think you are.
A true friend will not try to change anything about you.
These are some of the few points I have been able to think of when you are trying to identify fake friends. I’m sure there’s a lot more out there but that’s all I have. Thanks for reading.